If you are a die-hard Akshay Kumar fan and can simply love him in every avatar of his, Tees Maar Khan can be the movie for you but if he fails to create that magic for you  –better miss it or just do not expect too much from the movie. But, it does not mean that the movie would be a total no PAISA VASOOL connotation. During the entire course of the movie, you would feel that Farah Khan has become successful yet again in presenting what she wanted from her actors rather than getting what they offered. Here is another film-inside-film narrative for which Bollywood would never find an actor to play an artificial, boisterous and atrocious role as better as Akshaye Khanna.  
 
Katrina however is seen in a completely different look playing a self-acclaimed actress basking in the glory of success in her B-grade stardom. With layers of make-up, lesser clothes and very few dialogues – she practically has nothing to do on the sets. She just seems to be used as a spice in this otherwise tasteless recipe displaying her midriff – adding a NAVEL factor, which can be considered novel too. Thus, Farah probably has learnt the slapstick sensibilities of her sibling Sajid and displays them to the fullest in the film.  
 
Quite contrary to his name, the protagonist of our film, Akshay Kumar aka Tees Maar Khan unveils the entire plot of the film in the very first hour leaving nothing for the viewers’ imagination. Irrespective of his claim to fame in the film, of being an international criminal, he hardly airs a fear factor. But post TMK, you can definitely refer to Akshay as a C-grade comedian.  

Yes, comedy is the only flavor of the film that helps the viewers sit through it. You would be amazed to see how a super-star of his times, Aatish Kapoor (played by Akshaye Khanna) aiming for an Oscar is not able to comprehend that a one-take shoot, with no script, filmed by an only handheld camera can be nothing but a swindle for heist. Similarly, the picturisation of a self-proclaimed director coming to a village without a shooting permit wooing the only inspector of the village along with the villagers is idiotic but hilarious. Although at one point, the film does appear to become quite interesting with feelings of patriotism filling the air as everyone on the screen partakes one of the most extraordinary LOOTs of Hindi cinema but the suspense soon gets over in the plainest way possible.     

Hence, despite the gyrations from Sheila alias Katrina in the most popular item numbers of our times coupled with a guest appearance of Sallu bhai (Salman Khan), this remake of Vittorio De Sica’s ‘Caccia Alla Volpe’ (After the Fox), back in 1966, starring Peter Sellers, could get only three stars on the charts.  

“Tees Maar Khan is a classic example of a cluttered film in which a hodgepodge of characters incoherently jabbers ludicrous dialogues building up an odd plot that just refuses to make any sense at any point of time,” reports DNA.  

Hence, it would definitely be no exaggeration saying that Tees Maar Khan can be termed as a total disaster for Khiladi Kumar, who seems to be loosing his charisma. The viewers might have hoped to see some magical moments with their favorite Akki-Katty Jodi but the duo hardly have any moments together. Having wasted my Christmas Eve on the movie, I wished I could watch more of Farah in the film and almost none of Shirish, and practically no Akki but Shah Rukh and above all, less of almost everyone and a lot more of Katrina.

All in all, TMK is one of the first ever-odd Bollywood movie prepared half-heartedly by a woman known to have done nothing in half measure till date.